Your Inner Critic Isn’t the Boss of You
We All Have That Voice
You know the one.The one that chimes in right when you’re feeling brave, when you’re about to post the thing, make the call, apply for the opportunity, or finally step into your power.
She whispers:
“You’re not ready.”
“Who do you think you are?”
“Someone else could do it better.”
Sound familiar? That’s your inner critic, the voice of self-doubt dressed as logic. She’s loud, persuasive, and loves to show up uninvited whenever you’re about to level up.
She’s Not Your Enemy, She’s Just Scared
Here’s the truth most people don’t realise: your inner critic isn’t trying to ruin your life. She’s trying to protect you.
That voice comes from a part of your brain wired to avoid risk and pain. She’s the one who remembers every time you failed, got rejected, or embarrassed yourself, and she’s determined not to let it happen again.
So instead of cheering you on, she keeps you safe by keeping you small. But comfort and growth can’t coexist. The same walls that protect you also limit you.
When you understand that, her power starts to fade. You stop seeing her as the enemy and start seeing her as an overprotective friend who means well but doesn’t know what’s best for you anymore.
How to Talk Back (Kindly)
You’ll never completely get rid of that inner voice, and that’s okay. The goal isn’t silence; it’s control.
Here’s a simple way to handle her next time she pipes up:
Pause and notice her.
Don’t argue or spiral, just recognise she’s there. Awareness is everything.Thank her for her concern.
It sounds silly, but it’s powerful. Try saying, “I know you’re trying to keep me safe, but I’ve got this.”Reframe the fear.
Ask yourself, “What’s the best that could happen?” instead of the worst.Take action anyway.
Courage isn’t about not feeling scared, it’s about moving with the fear, not waiting for it to leave.
Each time you do something despite the doubt, you weaken that voice’s grip and build evidence that you can trust yourself.
The Confidence Loop
Confidence doesn’t magically appear, it’s built through evidence. When you take small steps, even scared ones, your brain learns: “Oh, I did that, and I survived.”
That becomes proof. Proof turns into belief. And belief turns into confidence.
It’s not about positive thinking or pretending you’re fearless, it’s about showing your brain that you can act without certainty. That’s how real, grounded confidence grows, one brave choice at a time.
You Get to Be in Charge
So the next time your inner critic tells you you’re not ready, remind her who’s running the show. Because you’ve done hard things before. You’ve faced worse. And you’ve always found a way through.
Your inner critic can sit in the passenger seat if she wants, but she doesn’t get to drive.
Show up anyway. Speak up anyway. Because the woman you’re becoming is already waiting on the other side of “what if.”
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